Top 10

Ways NOT to Share Your Faith

1. Stand on the corner and scream “REPENT!” at others. If it didn’t work for Jeremiah the prophet, it won’t work for you.
   
2. Break into a public high school and shove gospel tracts into the lockers. Trust me on this. I’ve done it…seriously.
   
3. Wear a “Ready to die…ask me why” T-Shirt. I’ve done this too. It’s not effective, but it did scare people.
   
4. Go into a bookstore and secretly slip gospel tracts into all of the New Age/Witchcraft books. Have I done this? Maybe…okay, yes.
   
5. Put gospel tracts in the hands of the mannequins at J.C. Penneys. While it looks like the fashion dummy is offering the gospel tract it’s the real dummy that gets thrown out of the mall. Suffice it to say that I’ve met many security guards this way and they are nothing like the guy in “Mall Cop.”
   
6. Use fake $100 dollar bills with “the gospel” on them to get people excited that they found a $100 dollar bill and then get them ticked off when they realize that they didn’t.
   
7. Go on Christian television and offer the gospel as a way to get rich on earth. Does anybody have a barf bag?
   
8. Sky dive from 3,000 feet into an outdoor Atheist’s convention with “John 3:16″ painted on your parachute.
   
9. Yell out “I love Jesus how ’bout you?” in the middle of class.
   
10. Any kind of Christian bumper sticker (especially if you’re a bad driver!)

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