Monday, September 26, 2005

Klingons For Christ

January Workcamp

Purpose:
To provide an opportunity for persons to live and work on Kronos with Christians from the Klingon Empire.

What are we going to do when we get there?
Continue the construction of a secondary school. It's purpose is to provide continuous, quality education for its members. Participants must be willing to do physical labor, including masonary, carpentry, painting, wielding a bat'leth, and plastering. Construction experience is helpful, but not necessary. A willingness to interact with other workcampers and participate in activities is expected.

Will I have to live in a mud hut and eat gagh?
No, at least not most of the time. On the project you will live in dormitory style facilities with the Klingon workcampers (no private accommodations); other times you will be in guest houses and/or homes. Meals will consist of a variety of Klingon food and sometimes simple American food. You should come prepared for a culinary experience.

What is this all going to cost?
$ 2200.00*--This includes round-trip travel from the closest airport in the continental US and all living expenses while in Nigeria.

Completed applications are due by October 3, 2005

* This price is subsidized by the Global Mission Partnership office of the Church of the Brethren's General Board. This price is also subject to current airfare rates.

Friday, September 23, 2005

Bridge

Are You Religious?

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump. I ran over and said: “Stop. Don’t do it.”

“Why shouldn’t I?” he asked.

“Well, there’s so much to live for!”

“Like what?”

“Are you religious?”

He said, “Yes.”

I said, “Me too. Are you Christian or Buddhist?”

“Christian.”

“Me too. Are you Catholic or Protestant?”

“Protestant.”

“Me too. Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?”

“Baptist.”

“Wow. Me too. Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?”

“Baptist Church of God.”

“Me too. Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?”

“Reformed Baptist Church of God.”

“Me too. Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?”

He said: “Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915.”

I said: “Die, heretic scum,” and pushed him off.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

YogaBear

Another View of Yoga

It’s a practice you may know; Yoga; Yoga
It’s a practice you may know; Yoga, Yoga, Aum
Yoga, Yoga, Aum; Yoga, Yoga, Aum
It’s a practice you may know; Yoga, Yoga, Aum

When it’s done by a bear, he’s Yoga Yogi
When it’s done by a bear, he’s Yoga Yogi Bear
Yoga Yogi Bear; Yoga Yogi Bear
When it’s done by a bear, he’s Yoga Yogi Bear

When it’s done on Degobah, Yoda Yoga
When it’s done on Degobah, Yoda Yoga it is
Yoda Yoga it is; Yoda Yoga it is
When it’s done on Degobah, Yoda Yoga it is.

Some folks do not like yoga, Dunker Journal
Some folks do not like yoga, Dunker Journal Blog
Dunker Journal Blog; Dunker Journal Blog
Some folks do not like yoga, Dunker Journal Blog

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Gather Round

Gather 'Round

The Gather 'Round curriculum project still has openings for writers for two curriculum units. Persons wishing to submit an application for the Preschool unit (ages 3-4, with tips for 2s) or the Multi-age unit (grades K-6, with suggestions for older students) may request an application packet. Accepted candidates must attend a writers' conference at Camp Alexander Mack on Jan. 8-12, 2006. Writing will begin in January. Deadline for applications is Nov. 1.

Brethren Press will begin catering to the more conservative Brethren with their new curriculum. Summer is over, but these book are good all year round: Summer Reading For True Christian Kids.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

BadGravity

Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling' Theory

As the debate over the teaching of evolution in public schools continues, a new controversy over the science curriculum arose in the embattled Midwestern state of Kansas. Scientists from the Evangelical Center For Faith-Based Reasoning are now asserting that the long-held "theory of gravity" is flawed, and they have responded to it with a new theory of Intelligent Falling.

"Things fall not because they are acted upon by some gravitational force, but because a higher intelligence, 'God' if you will, is pushing them down," said Gabriel Burdett, who holds degrees in education, applied Scripture, and physics from Oral Roberts University.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Global Warming

Warming Up The Church

In a recently released study, Indur B. Goklany has found a direct relationship between increased global warming and homosexualism and the progressive church. "As global warming has increased, we have seen a corresponding increase of liberal Christianity." Goklany, who has been linked to oil companies' funding of environmental studies, claims that his critics are just cynically trying to avoid the discussion of the need for environmentalism. "Caring for God's creation is not only in the domain of the progressive Church. Conservatives and Evangelicals can feel good about being green."