Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Results Are In

Boobquake Results
Out of respect for Our Lord and for the edification of our neighbour, we ask all to appear in church modestly dressed. For women and girls, they are not met by slacks, shorts, sleeveless and low-cut dresses. For men and boys, shorts and T-shirts do not meet the norms of modesty neither do sleeveless or tight fitting clothing. True modesty likewise demands that women and girls wear head coverings whilst in church, as St Paul enjoins (1 Corinthians XIII) Please show your Love for Our Divine Lord present in the Blessed Sacrament and show respect for the House of God. However, no one has the right to question dress, especially that of visitors. It belongs to the Pastor alone to instruct others when their dress is below expectations.
The results of boobquake are in, and it seems that, contrary to what some Muslims and conservative Christians think, “immodesty” does not cause earthquakes. In fact, the average magnitude of earthquakes was actually slightly lower than the average for the past two months Perhaps the hypothesis that immodest women reduce earthquakes needs to be examined.

Monday, April 26, 2010

Friday, April 23, 2010

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Experience the Soothing Power

Combines the Most Powerful Forces of Heaven and Earth

Do you believe? Wear this solid COPPER MAGNETIC THERAPY JESUS BRACELET for the most powerful healing and comfort you’ve ever experienced! COPPER has been relied on for centuries to ease the pain of arthritis. MAGNETS are used therapeutically to ease muscle pain, tendinitis, bursitis, back pain, poor circulation and more. And faith in the miracles of JESUS can not only protect you from physical pain, but soothe your soul in times of stress! Fully adjustable to fit most wrists.

Friday, April 16, 2010

Jesus loves bacon too.

The Lard Moves in Mysterious Ways

Toby Elles, 22, made the discovery after burning the food when he fell asleep while cooking.

After lifting off the scorched bacon Mr Elles, from Salford, Lancs, could not believe his eyes when the Christlike image stared back at him.

The face is complete with eyes, nose, a beard and is framed by long flowing hair.

Mr Elles, a cashier for Halifax Bank, said: "I fell asleep cooking some bacon and it had burned this face onto the pan, it's some kind of miracle.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

This is Only a Test

Demon Test

This may be the most important spiritual decision you have made. This Test is the result of more than 30 years of research and thousands of hours in personal ministry with troubled souls. Through this vast experience they have been able, with God's help, to design this test to quickly determine an individual's spiritual needs.

At the Spiritual Freedom Church, they are committed to helping you change your life. Their purpose is to introduce you to integrative emotional healing and spiritual deliverance, for whole-person wellness.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Mind Boggling

(Access to) Knowledge is Power

Nightline points out that the fundamentalist agenda is influencing education in the entire country; a wake-up call for anyone who still believes in the separation of church and state.

Friday, April 09, 2010

Thursday, April 08, 2010

Tuesday, April 06, 2010

Pump You Up

Body of Christ Workout

Emerging from a grueling 90 minutes of cardiovascular exercise and light lifting for tone, Son of God Jesus Christ said Monday that He is "definitely on track" to achieve peak fitness condition for the Second Coming.

Since His birthday last Dec. 25, Christ has committed Himself to a demanding daily regimen of exercise and prophecy fulfillment. Each of His workouts, Christ said, starts with an hour of cardio, after which He focuses on two muscle groups, replacing conventional free weights with the Rod of Iron with which He intends to rule all nations.

Monday, April 05, 2010

Saturday, April 03, 2010

Like Spider-Man 2

American Jesus

Mark Millar says he's had lots of interest in American Jesus, his story of the Second Coming, now that Wanted has made money. But studios were really nervous about the subject matter, and studio execs asked if they could take Jesus out of the film.

Millar sees American Jesus as a sequel to the Passion Of The Christ, which is like Jesus' "origin story." In other words, this is like the Spider-Man 2 to Passion Of The Christ's Spider-Man. But due to studio squeamishness, he thinks he may have to do it outside the studio system.

Friday, April 02, 2010

Spiritual Warfare

Repent Amarillo

Army of God is not designed for non-christians, It is designed as a recruitment tool to call certain Christians to spiritual warfare. While some of them support their efforts, and some may not, it is not about us and it is not about them. It is about Jesus Christ.

Thursday, April 01, 2010

It's Your Fault

Blame the Victim

Nineteen-year-old Keshia Canter handed three burgers, fries and milkshakes to a car-load of Tuesday afternoon customers at the Hi-Lo Burger’s drive-though window. A lady sitting in the backseat leaned forward, between the two men in front, and handed her a leaflet: “Women & Girls” it said across the top.

“Even though nothing is showing, you’re being ungodly,” Canter recalled the woman telling her. “You make men want to be sinful.